short funny quotes

Do I look like a freakin' People Person? cool sayings on Cool Quotes

 No Radio - Already Stolen! cute girlie quotes by Cool Pickup

 If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? cool quote about Cute Quotes

 If you and your friend are being chased by a grizzly bear, don't worry about out-running the bear, just worry about out-running your friend. sweet sayings by Wise Guy

 YES this is my truck, NO I won't help you move!. cute saying about cute girlie quotes

 Anyone who says 'Easy as taking candy from a baby' has never tried it. sweet quotations about Parenting

 There is much more here than what meets the eye. cool sayings on Pickup Lines

 How about never? is never good for you? cute girlie quotes by Cool Pickup

 Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly and for the same reason. cool quote about Politics

 A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you.~Bert Leston Taylor sweet sayings by Funny Life

 I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life.~Kevin Spacey, American Beauty cute saying about cute girlie quotes

 REAL procrastination is watching a hungry bear walk up to you while having a picnic, and not running because hey, you've got the rest of your life. sweet quotations about Works

 If you can read this I have lost my caravan. cool sayings on Cute Sayings
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 Excuse me, do I need to buy a ticket for your fantastic voyage? cute girlie quotes by Cool Pickup

 Consciousness: that annoying time between naps. cool quote about Cool Quotes

Why is it that night falls but day breaks? cute song quotes by Mr Q

 The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth. cool quote about Proverbs

 If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? sweet sayings by Mr Q

 Excuse me, I'd like to have kids someday, and I wanted to know how your parents created such a beautiful creature. cute saying about cute song quotes

 Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he'll sit in a boat and drink beer all day. sweet quotations about Sports

 God Must Love Stupid People, He Made So Many cool sayings on Cute Quotes

 Why is there an expiration date on sour cream? cute song quotes by Mr Q

 Why do mattresses have springs, if they aren't made for jumping on? cool quote about Question

 Stick with me baby and I'll buy you rocks as big as diamonds. sweet sayings by Hitter

 Somebody said to me, 'But the Beatles were anti-materialistic.' That's a huge myth. John and I literally used to sit down and say, 'Now, let's write a swimming pool.'~Paul McCartney cute saying about cute song quotes

 If we outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. sweet quotations about Cute Quotes

 Caution -- Driver Legally Blonde cool sayings on Cool Quotes

 The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra. cute song quotes by Cool Girl

 If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a picture of a thousand words worth? cool quote about Question

Love is never having to say 'Shut the hell up.'~Wally Pleasant cute song quotes by Romantica

 HONK IF YOU LOVE GORE (use the button on your steering wheel) cool quote about Cute Quotes

 Drop Dead sweet sayings by Cool Pickup

 If you don't like the news, go out and make some. cute saying about cute song quotes

 Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it. sweet quotations about Cool Quotes

 Everyone is beautiful if you squint a bit. cool sayings on Truth

 A person is grown up not when they can take care of themselves, but when they can take care of others. cute song quotes by Funny Life

 It's been Monday all week. cool quote about Cute Sayings

 I DON'T DRINK IT DULLS THE DRUGS. sweet sayings by Cool Pickup

 Idiots of a feather, flock together. cute saying about cute song quotes

And the sea will grant each man new hope, as sleep brings dreams of home.~Christopher Columbus. cool sayings on Funny

 How can you be ALONE with somebody? Think about it... cute quotes for myspace by Mr Q

 It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it. cool quote about Advice

 Do you have the time? [Gives the time] No, the time to write down my number? sweet sayings by Cool Pickup

 Some people wish to get what they deserve, while others fear the same. cute saying about cute quotes for myspace

 His bark is louder than his bite. sweet quotations about Cool Cute Quotes

 Illegal drugs are the chlorine in the gene pool. cool sayings on Thinking

 Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you. cute quotes for myspace by Cool Pickup

 I want a sensitive man~one who'll cry when I hit him. cool quote about Battle of the sexes

 Why do hotdogs' come in a package 12 and the hotdog rolls come in a package of 8? sweet sayings by Mr Q

 Everything is always okay in the end, if it's not, then it's not the end. cute saying about cute quotes for myspace

 'Only when the the last tree has died and the last river has been poisoned and the last fish has been caught will we realise that we can not eat money'~19th Century Native Aamerican sweet quotations about Funny

 Proofread carefully to see if you any words out. cool sayings on Works

 I Just Got Lost In Thought. It Was Unfamiliar Territory cute quotes for myspace by Cool Pickup
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 A statesman who keeps his ear permanently glued to the ground will have neither elegance of posture nor flexibility of movement.~Abba Eban cool quote about Politics

 'If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing.'
 ~sweet quote on movie

  No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
 ~hilarious movie quote by Cute Girl

  Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.~Jackie Mason
 ~cool quote about Love

  I'm objective
 ~funny saying on movie

  On The Other Hand, You Have Different Fingers
 ~cute movie sayings about Cool Sayings

  On the other hand you have different fingers.
 ~funny quote about Clean Jokes

  Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
 ~sweet quote on movie

  Just say no to sex with pro-lifers.
 ~hilarious movie quote by Cool Pickup

  I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser
 ~cool quote about Golf quotes

  Don t forget to wash behind your ears.
 ~cute saying about heartbreak

   An open mind does not always require an open mouth.
 ~cool funny heartbreak jokes about Cool Cute Quotes

   Moooooove, I'm trying to speed!
 ~funny quote about Cool Quotes

   Short Chicks rock!
 ~cute quote on heartbreak

   Do you like anyone else in here? Well, I guess you are stuck with me.
 ~sweet funny heartbreak jokes by Cool Pickup

   Before you run, I am not a freak.
 ~cool quote about Pickup Lines

   Just plead the Fifth -- or drink it -- either way.
 ~cute saying about heartbreak

   The next time we elect a president, for God's sake can we do a background check?~David Letterman
 ~cool funny heartbreak jokes about Politics

   money may not buy happiness, but it sure makes misery much easier to live with.
 ~funny quote about Truth

 Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?
 ~cute saying about teenage

   If you can read this. thank a teacher.
 ~cool funny teenage quotes about Cute Sayings

   Live dangerously and you live right.
 ~funny quote about Proverbs

   Stop thinking police procedures, start thinking playstation~Xander Cage (Vin Deisel)
 ~cute quote on teenage

   A cheap shot is a terrible thing to waste.
 ~sweet funny teenage quotes by Wonderman

   Never pet a burning dog.
 ~cool quote about Advice

   First Prayer you should say: 'Dear God, I know you know everything, and I know that you know that I know that you know everything. So, you must know that I'm thankful for life... so I hereby say that I shouldn't have to spend my nights on my knees saying my thoughts to someone who already knows what I think. So this is my last and only prayer... it's either that or get me a damn kneepad.'
 ~cute saying about teenage

   For people who like peace and quiet~a phoneless cord.
 ~cool funny teenage quotes about One liner

 A woman worries about the future until she gets a
husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a
wife.
 ~hilarious quote about FUTURE Jokes

    My father was a simple man. My mother was a simple woman. You see the result standing in front of you, a simpleton.
 ~funny saying about boys

   One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor
 ~cool funny boys messages about Drink quotes

   The best part about procrastination is that you are never bored, because you have all kinds of things that you should be doing.
 ~humor quote about Funny Laziness

  If at first you don't succeed, skydiving ain't for you.
 ~cool quote about Cute Quotes

   People who say 'Don't Postpone Joy' are usually in outrageous credit card debt.~Daniel Casey
 ~cute saying about sublime

   The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
 ~cool hilarious sublime phrases about One liner

   Anyone who says 'Easy as taking candy from a baby' has never tried it.
 ~funny quote about Parenting

   'The common people like to be deceived. Deceived let them be' --Old Roman Saying
 ~cute quote on sublime

   Slow thinkers keep right.
 ~sweet hilarious sublime phrases by Cool Pickup

   A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from a mountain top.
 ~cool quote about Proverbs

   New music is old music played twice as fast and half as well~James Douglass Morrison
 ~cute saying about sublime
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   It's so cold here, the lawyers have there hands in their own pockets!
 ~cool hilarious sublime phrases about One liner

 At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry.
 ~sweet quote on birthday

  Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I had to kill because they pissed me off
 ~hilarious birthday quote by Worker

  If someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and whack them in the head.
 ~cool quote about Advice

  It is better to regret something you did, rather than to regret something you didn't do.
 ~funny saying on birthday

  Why do people point to their wrists when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
 ~cute birthday sayings about Thinking

  Have you ever noticed how nothing is impossible for those who don't have to do it?
 ~funny quote about Cute Quotes

  It Is As Bad As You Think, And They Are Out To Get You.
 ~sweet quote on birthday